Monday, December 19, 2005

Lewis's single to avoid (19/12/05)

James Blunt - 'Goodbye My Lover'
Apparently 'James Blunt' has entered the realms of Cockney rhyming slang, as a term for the female genital organs. Whatever could that be? Rarely has any form of language stemming from London retained such a sense of overarching perspective. Fresh from hauling the Queen Mother's corpse up to Westminster, the loathsome toff returns with this painfully tuneless piano dirge, presumably under the impression that it's Christmas, and that at Christmas people like this kind of dross. I urge you to resist. 'Did I disappoint you, or let you down?', he squeaks, by means of an opening line. No, James. We've never expected you to be anything but the amoebic twerp you've always been. In fact you're fulfilling that role as richly as ever. As a refrain he mumbles 'I'm so hollow, baby, I'm so hollow'. Is this James Blunt's great song of self-realization? Afraid not. The rest of the lyrics are too staggeringly bland for this to mean anything at all, really. It sounds like it should be used in a US teen drama, to soundtrack a scene in which one of the androgynously-named characters has recently snuffed it. That's all it's worth. Have you ever considered joining the Marines, James?